Doctor Who Oh No It Isn't Paul Cornell

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.At this moment, they'd surrounded Professor Warrinder, the Head of Psi, a Pakhar male.The Pakhars were short and fluffy, with powerful hind limbs and little paws.They reminded Bernice of nothing more than giant hamsters, as she'd told Warrinder one night over a bowl of Kinsa seeds in the Collins College bar.He'd laughed at the photo of the hamster Bernice had once owned, and said that that had nothing to do with evolution, and everything to do with the wonderful sense of humour that the universe had.Which was probably what lay behind the coincidence of the dear ladies, too.Warrinder was possibly the most powerful psychic that his race had ever produced.His talent was precognition, for which reason he was barracked by the Physics Department at every senate meeting.'Predict this!' they'd shout at him, throwing their lunch at the Pakhar in an effort to prove that he couldn't possibly peep over the parapet of time.But Warrinder persisted, and Bernice, who had a rather grand and poetic view of space and time, and had really loved her hamster, admired him for it.She believed in his powers completely.The first thing he'd said to her was, 'Yes, I can.' Bernice's reply had been: 'I hear you can predict the future?' The dear ladies of Etiquette doubtless had views of their own on precognition, but both loved Warrinder equally.Ferociously and competitively.The three-way conversation between them currently centred on whose onboard party Warrinder would attend on the way to Perfecton.A large number of academics had booked places on the archaeology trip to this particularly famous planet, and by the sound of the conversations Bernice had overheard on the subject, many of them had decided to make a cruise of it.'I shall have the ship's captain at my party,' Hettie was assuring Professor Warrinder.'That is entirely possible.' Lucinda agreed.'If the captain can be in two places at once, since he has personally assured me –'Bernice jumped off her bicycle and made an extravagant and sudden motion with her arms in front of the three of them.Any verbal attempt to butt into one of the warring academics' battles inevitably began a joint assault on the rudeness of the interloper.'Excuse me.Has anybody seen my cat?'Warrinder grabbed her hand in his paws, relieved at the interruption.'Wolsey? Yes, I have seen him.In a dream last night.''So could you tell me where he is?'The two old ladies glanced at the paws clasped around Bernice's hand, at each other, and then back to Bernice, glowering.Warrinder's little eyes glittered for a moment.Then he nodded.'He is in the cloisters of Pierce College.'Bernice beamed, kissed Warrinder on his fluffy cheek, and hopped on her bicycle again.'Thanks!' she called as she cycled off.'Never shorten a thank you!' Hettie bellowed after her.'Honestly, these younger academics.Such a bad example.Now, Professor Warrinder, as I was saying.'Bernice crossed on to the smallest island of the campus via a travel tube.She parked her bicycle in the rack at the gates of Pierce College, thankful that the rain had eased slightly.Pierce was the college that housed the mature students, home of Philosophy and Literature of the Milky Way.It was in a quieter part of the islands.Bernice wandered into the Pierce courtyard, glancing around at the elegantly bioengineered gardens, the trees dripping in the rain.She ran a hand through her hair, smoothing the water from it.Wolsey was nowhere in sight.There was only one person in the quad, standing by the fountains that surrounded a marble statue of a woman, her arms spread wide.The man was clad in a black academic gown, and he had his hands clasped behind his back.The courtyard was full of the sound of water: the rain, the fountains, and the rush of it around the guttering of the roofs.Bernice was about to call to the man when he turned, opened his mouth in surprise, and then smiled at her.'Ah.Professor Summerfield.I've been hoping to meet you.' He stepped towards her.His voice was rich and cultured, possibly an old Earth accent.He had a face that was lined with experience, the sort of face a vicar or an aged comedian might have.His eyes were extraordinary, and they held Bernice for a moment.They were dancing with interest, as if she was suddenly the most important thing in the world to this man.'You have me at a disadvantage,' said Bernice, wondering if she'd met him at one of the many induction evenings and staff get-togethers.'Professor Archduke,' he said, taking her hand with a cold smile.'Earth Literature.I specialize in Obscure Theatrical Forms.''Pleased to meet you.I was just wondering –'Another cat enquiry would have followed, but then something very strange happened.From above the courtyard came the sound of a scream.A thin, high-pitched scream, increasing in volume above the noise of water.It was coming closer.Bernice, who'd been in the odd bombardment in her life, was the first to look upwards.A missile was falling straight towards them.A little, darker, dot against the storm clouds of the sky.It was getting bigger every second.No, not a missile, she thought, as she threw herself at Professor Archduke and crushed him into the wet gravel, shielding him with her body, it was actually a –The falling thing hit the statue and exploded.Into flesh.The body hit with a terrible thump, like meat thrown on to a butcher's slab.And then there was silence.Bernice and Archduke gathered themselves up, wiping bits of blue stuff off their clothing, and got to their feet.Splattered across the statue were the remains of an alien corpse.The body was humanoid, its uniformed midriff crumpled across the torso of the statue, its limbs everywhere, its head a mess in the bowl of the fountain, where the waters were already spraying blue.Bernice realized that, as she'd looked up, already moving, she'd seen its eyes, its face – there had been something odd about its face, as if it was covered in string – its expression of fear.She thought that perhaps the species was familiar, but there was no way to identify it from what remained.'If that's something to do with Rag Week,' she told Archduke, 'then I'm resigning my post.'They poked around the corpse as Porters came buzzing in, their little sirens disturbing the quiet of the quad.There seemed to be nothing in the sky above, nowhere the creature could have come from.Bernice was too shocked to feel horror or squeamishness [ Pobierz całość w formacie PDF ]

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