Carman, Patrick Dark Eden

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.Either that or I’d gone totally deaf in the basement of Mrs.Goring’s bunker.I squeezed the water bottle in my hand and heard the cheap plastic crinkling between my fingers.At least I hadn’t lapsed into a nightmare.I thought my luck might improve with one of the other buttons, so I pushed in the white G button.When I did, the M button popped back out, and the screen began to fill with the image of a different room.The tube inside the monitor struggled to life, the image fluttering and weak.It was dimmer than the first, and the picture never settled down entirely.Whatever camera it was attached to was pointed directly at a chair, which was empty.Behind the chair was a gray concrete wall with the numbers 2, 5, and 7 stenciled in red, just like the bomb shelter door.I backed away from the monitor, sensing that there was a connection here.Whoever had painted the bomb shelter door had also painted the 2, the 5, and the 7.I suspected that the room was upstairs in the Bunker, and I just hadn’t seen it.Either that or it was in Fort Eden.I crept forward and pushed in the B button.The screen died again, then slowly shimmered back to life.It was the same as the last scene: an empty chair, a gray wall, and four other numbers, stenciled in red: 1, 3, 4, 6.“Creepy,” I whispered, drinking down the last of the water and hoping that the toilet would flush quietly when the time came to use it.I felt suddenly tired and looked at my watch for the first time in hours: 10:35 PM.How had it gotten so late, so fast?I sat on the sagging cot to think, staring at the empty room and the four numbers.“It’s us,” I said, leaning back on my elbows, feeling the weight of sleep edging closer.“Seven numbers, seven patients.G for girls, B for boys, M for main room.”I was certain of this in the same way that I knew I could return any face burner Keith fired across our air hockey table back home.These numbers were us.These rooms meant something.I put my arms behind my head and laid back, a heavy feeling on my eyelids.So quiet.So very, very quiet, like a silent torture chamber that was sucking my will to live.Keith’s voice appeared at the last edge of wakefulness.Change the channel, Will.This show is ultralame.And then I was asleep.The slick floor of the hallway is cold on my body, but I’m so weak I can’t get up.The hall is white and long.I am alone, then there’s a shadow, far away and moving toward me: a rolling gurney with a body on top, the sound of its wheels rattling.It’s close now, the white sheet stained with blood.I want to get up as the cart moves past, but I can’t.Will?It’s Marisa on the gurney, smiling vacantly.I wanna be adored.Get up, Will.Get up.Intruder alert! Intruder alert!I was off the cot and on my feet, my mind caught between alertness and sleep.Where was I? The van, the path, Fort Eden, the Bunker, the basement.I was lying on a cot in a bomb shelter, not sitting on a white floor watching Marisa roll by.And yet, in the deep silence of the basement, the wheels of the gurney were there.One of the wheels was flapping back and forth as if it was attached to a bad grocery cart.There was no time to hide and no point in turning off the light in the bomb shelter.Whoever had come into the basement had turned on the main lights, so turning off mine wasn’t going to make any difference.I saw shadows roll by through the crack I’d left in the door.The gurney was not only real, it was moving through the basement.It stopped where they kept the dry goods.I remembered the closed door I’d seen there, the one I hadn’t gone back to and opened.That must be where they keep the bodies.This thought circled through my brain until the sound of the wheels faded and then almost disappeared entirely.I looked at my watch: 10:58 PM.I’d only slept for about twenty minutes.Opening the heavy bomb shelter door another inch, I peered into the lit basement and found it empty.From my vantage point I could see that the door leading back upstairs had been left wide-open.I could escape into the woods, or at least into the kitchen.But who would I meet there: Mrs.Goring, standing in the Bunker with a meat cleaver?I talked myself off the madhouse ledge I’d crawled onto and stepped out into the basement.Whoever had been down here was gone now, through the door I hadn’t bothered to open.I went quickly for the ramp that led upstairs, peeking around the corner.No one up there, or so it seemed, but I’d left my backpack in the bomb shelter.I turned to go back and saw light coming from under the door of the room where the gurney had gone.And something more than that—I heard voices.A small cheer, in fact, or something like one, far off down a hallway I couldn’t see.I crept to the door and looked around its edge, hopelessly confused.“Hands off the cart!”It was Mrs.Goring’s voice, at the top of a much longer ramp.A tunnel, slanting up like the one from the basement to the Bunker, stretched thirty yards or more between two buildings.She was in Fort Eden.And it wasn’t a hospital gurney she was pushing but a food cart filled with late-night snacks.“That’s it for tonight.Make the most of it.” Mrs.Goring’s mouselike voice glided down the tunnel.A door at the far end was slammed shut, and the cart was rolling toward me once more.She passed under the first of five grimy lightbulbs, one every twenty feet, and I backed away from the door.Stepping quietly toward my hiding place, it occurred to me that I might be able to get across on my own.Maybe if I waited until everyone was asleep I could find out what was really going on without anyone knowing.Mrs.Goring’s empty cart was clamoring down the runway as I reentered the bomb shelter and dialed down the light.Darkness would have engulfed me if not for the glow of the monitor screen, which I had neglected to turn off.I went to push the black OFF button, just to be extra careful, and that’s when I saw it on the monitor screen.Ben Dugan was sitting in the chair.I tried to read Ben’s lips, but it was no use.Whatever he was saying didn’t register on my end.There were pauses, as if he was trying to decide if he should keep going or not.I couldn’t stand the silence anymore and took out my Recorder, dialed in BEN DUGAN, and hit PLAY.The funny thing was, watching his face on the screen and hearing his voice in my head almost felt real, like the two belonged together.The first voice in my head was Dr.Stevens’s.When was the first time you felt this way? Go back as far as you can remember.I don’t know.I forget.What did you forget?That’s an unanswerable question.I don’t remember what I forgot.Right, but there’s a clue here, you see? There are things you don’t want to remember, so you don’t.When you think of these things—the events you don’t want recorded in your memory—what are they? What is it about them that make you afraid?I don’t like dirt.Okay.That’s a start.So, if you’re digging around in the dirt, that bothers you?I wouldn’t know.I don’t think I’ve ever done that.Oh, but you have, Ben.Trust me, you have done this.And you’re still alive.I don’t remember.What is it about dirt that bothers you so?Is there any water in here?No, there’s no water.Not until you tell me.We’ve been at this a long time.You have to tell me, Ben.What is it about dirt that bothers you so?I don’t remember.You do remember.I don’t.The session dissolved into a similar pattern after that: You do remember; No, I don’t; Where’s the water? I’d heard it a few times, so I knew.I unwrapped a Clif Bar and popped the earbuds out of my ears.Ben Dugan leaned down and picked up something off the floor where I couldn’t see it.He got up off the chair, holding something in his hand.“What’s he doing now?” I wondered, biting a corner off the chewy bar as if I was watching a movie.He was facing away from the camera, staring at the wall, gripping some sort of blunt tool [ Pobierz całość w formacie PDF ]

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