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.“Much better— nice.”Although he’s seen me naked a million times.I love his praise, and so does my cock.Luckily, I left some lube in the living room (it’s always good to be prepared), and pretty soon I’m about to straddle him on the sofa.Dan’s desperate, running his hands all over my chest and stomach, as I lower onto him gingerly, paying for yesterday’s workout session.I rest on him, just rocking slowly and stroking his pecs and neck.I’m full with him, but I still want more— an overpowering tantalising itch.Dan massages my arse, and the power of those large hands on my buttocks and hips makes me moan, my head flung back.I need him to look at me, see through me, and find me.Shivers run down my body, as he watches me slowly start to lose it.“So beautiful,” he whispers, holding my hips more firmly and rocking back up to me, holding my gaze.I love his attention, the way he’s guiding my pleasure.The pressure building in my balls is becoming too much, so I kiss down his neck and roll my arse and stomach muscles in a way that drives him fucking wild— leaning slightly back onto his hands so he can see my cock jutting up there for him.Suddenly, pleasing him seems more important than anything else, and I speed up until he’s sweating and grimacing, then flick a nipple hard— just the way he likes it.For all his iron control and discipline, I can make Dan pant with need in bed.He’s told me he loves my body and now my inner control freak is grunting and moaning, beside himself.No words in the dictionary can describe the exquisiteness of it.He grips my waist and pumps up into me, hard and desperate, and I all I can do is smilecry into his face, understanding his emotion and vulnerability.I fist myself furiously, pushing, pushing, and come all over his chest and chin before collapsing onto him.My body and heart cling to my guy, my rock.His muscular arms wrap around me, and he strokes my neck as we catch our breath.“So good,” I manage to whisper into his skin, wishing I was able to say more.My ultimate aim is to make him scream as he comes; to completely forget about his usual worries, like hapless criminals, or being gay, or some unpaid bills.To give him that.Hopefully.My wishful thinking does not stop there.One day soon, he’ll fuck me outdoors, up a wall, tearing my lacy underwear.Then, of course, I plan to win a million bucks from the lottery and get a top dancing job.But for now I’ll take the screaming.I don’t tell him this though— don’t want him being overwhelmed by my confession during our sexathon.I’ll tell him tonight, or maybe tomorrow, about the undies…The rest of the day is relaxed— just watching television and doing chores together.He keeps glancing at his phone though, when he thinks I’m not watching, which is really not like him.“What’s up?” I ask, but he just shakes his head— too important for little me to know.I understand that he has a difficult and demanding job, and he has no need to feel guilty if it occasionally (all the bloody time) takes him away from me.I’m not unreasonable (moi?), only sulky sometimes.Why don’t they fuck off and leave him alone? Unreasonable selfish bastards.A bleeping phone in the middle of the night and urgent whispers and he’s gone from the bedroom.What the fuck is he doing?“Dan?”He’s standing in the living room, bollock naked, with his phone in one hand, pulling out his hair with the other.That is not normal behaviour.“Dan.”He sees me and ends the conversation abruptly, snapping his phone shut then hurling it across the room, where it clatters into the wall.It’s been years, but still my body responds immediately, arms coming up to protect my head, trying to look as small as I can.“Oh, no, no.Niall! Come here.” He’s with me in two strides, and I’m wrapped up in his arms.“I’m not angry with you.It’s okay.Okay?” and he peers into my face and I know I’m all right.“Sorry,” I whisper, after a minute.“What’s going on? I know it’s bad.Can’t you tell me?”He shakes his head gently against mine.“I can’t.It’s just work.Something bad going down, like I told you.” I nod.I know how it is.The perils of being a policeman’s wife— if you can’t do the time, don’t do the crime.No way I’m giving up this crime, so I’ll just have to put up with the not knowing.Dan retrieves his phone, and we get back into bed.He pulls me onto his shoulder and I wait.Sometimes I can tell when he wants to talk.It’s like coaxing a stray cat— you have to give it some time then offer it scraps.So I wait a bit, then kiss his neck and lean up on one elbow to look at him.It’s dark anyway, but at least he’ll know I’m listening.He kisses me and looks back.I think.For all I know, he could be sticking out his tongue and going cross-eyed.“You thought I was going to hit you.Didn’t you?”Oh shit.I don’t want to go into that.I already told him the basics, and anyway it was years ago.I draw breath.“No.I didn’t think.That’s the point— it’s just a reaction— like if your knee gets hit, your leg flies up.” He strokes my back and thinks about it so hard I can sense the burning.“Anyone ever hits your knee, I’ll rip their head off.Got it?”I nod and smile, relieved.Heart-to-heart over.Thank God.There’s a lot that goes unsaid with me and my man, but none of it’s important.****When I get back to my own flat on Sunday morning, I feel deflated.More and more I don’t want to come home after being with Dan, but that’s just how things are.Dan never stays here— the first time he ever came in he looked around in horror.“You live here?” he’d asked incredulously.“If you can call it living!” I brushed it off with a pretty-yet-manly (offended) laugh and we never talked about it again, though he helped me change all the locks and reinforce the safety bolts.The next few days pass with the usual humdrum of life— college, working the bar, sleeping— until Dan calls to ask if I want to meet him at his place Wednesday night, as long as I call him, then check around the house before going in— calling him of course if I notice anything weird.I so do.“Niall? Bring some stuff, like we said.No need for you to go home every night.” I smile stupidly into the phone at him as if he can see.“I might be late, so just cook for yourself.” My lips brush the receiver, and he chuckles darkly.“Later, gorgeous.”I take my suitcase to his house and unpack my few things.I’m unsure where to put my clothes— don’t want to be presumptuous.There’s lots of room in Dan’s cupboards though, he’s a man of few garments, so in the end I just put mine with his stuff.Can’t help ruffling up his corners a bit.They look strange and smug there, cuddled up together with Dan’s clothes, or maybe I’m just in a sentimental mood?What to do with the undies.What shall I do with them? I’ve got to talk to him before mingling them in with his boxers, though I smirk at the thought of Dan coming across Cheeky Chappies and Velvet Vampire one morning as he shimmies into his all-whites [ Pobierz całość w formacie PDF ]

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